I can’t tell you how easy it is to aspire to do more and yet not follow through. Whether it is working out, reading, getting to know people, being more involved, or even trying to grow yourself, it is so easy to talk about it, but never do anything. If that resonates with you, then you understand addiction. Strugglers of addiction know how to talk, but struggle to walk. Why is this the case? How do you go from a talker to a walker when addiction is strong in you?

People Have Allegiances

Everyone has allegiances in their life. They are the things that you are committed to when push comes to shove. They are the things that you say yes most often to. They are things that you protect by saying no to other things. Whether it is people pleasing, comfort, reputation, success, performance, marriage, family, etc all of us have allegiances. Not all of them are bad in themselves, but they could be in the wrong order of loves. Struggling porn/sex addicts are no different except their allegiances are trapped in the addiction. Porn or sex has ahold of them and they are committed to it. They give up their time, energy, finances, and even good things in their lives to keep it going. Of course, they are miserable doing it, but they still do it.

Struggling addicts can’t grow out of their allegiance to addiction unless they commit to something else. That something else has to be better and worthy of your allegiance. Once you find it, you must commit to it through time, energy, and if necessary, finances. You can’t grow without commitment and your allegiances will never change without it. It is easy to talk, but it is harder to commit. “…But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 3:13-14). What do you give your allegiances to? What can you commit to in order to cultivate new allegiances?

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Schedule a call with Clifton to begin your first step in uncovering your allegiances.